


Celestial Crown

by itsaconquestofimagination



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Drama, Emperor Kylo Ren, F/M, Family Drama, Father-Daughter Relationship, Jedi, Jedi Training, Kylo Ren Angst, Kylo Ren Backstory, Past Relationship(s), Planet Naboo (Star Wars), Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Protective Kylo Ren, Protective Parents, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Sith, Skywalker Family Drama, Skywalker Family Feels, The Dark Side of the Force, The Force, empress Reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-27
Updated: 2016-10-27
Packaged: 2018-08-27 09:20:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 18,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8396176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsaconquestofimagination/pseuds/itsaconquestofimagination
Summary: Kylo Ren, once Ben Solo-Organa, has officially become the Emperor by the First Order, embracing the Dark Side. As he’s gaining territory across the galaxy quickly and forcefully, a sudden change comes along in his overthrow plan when he arrives at Naboo. He decides to strike them a deal, for the right price. The lovely senator as his bride.





	1. Chapter 1

_“Ben stop!” the girl giggled as she squirmed away from his touch playfully._

_He leaned his neck further towards her, brushing his lips on her neck. She gave in and came back towards his touch, leaning her head so he had access to her the expanse of her neck._

_“Ben, we’re going to get caught."_

_He smiled as he continued kissing her, "I don’t care (nickname)."_

_"But your, ah! Your mom."_

_"She’ll get over it. Just stay here with me.”_

_“Mmm, if you say so.”_

_He closed his eyes in bliss as he continued placing sweet kisses over her neck, his hands holding her close by the waist. He waited for these moments with such anticipation every day, when he’d get to simply be in her presence. Have the chance to hold her close, feel her skin, hear her laugh._

_“I wish we could do this forever,” he mumbled out between kisses, his hot breathe hitting the nape of her neck._

_“…but you know we won’t.”_

_He stopped suddenly, realizing her tone had gone morbidly serious and monotone from her previous tone of bliss. He pulled away slowly as he felt her move out of his grip, his surroundings of sunshine becoming suddenly dark and dreary. As his eyes wandered up he was startled and horrified. His sweet (Y/N) had disappeared only to be replaced by Supreme Leader Snoke. He backed away fearfully as Snoke followed his steps, a menacing smile on his face._

_“You have sealed your fate Kylo Ren, you sealed your heart to the light. Embrace it.”_

_Snokes voice started echoing through his head as he dropped to the ground, the sky behind Snoke turning an inky black._

_“No! No!”_

_“Embrace it!”_

* * *

 

Kylo jolted awake, as he shot straight up in his bed. His chest heaving from his frantic breathes, sweat sitting on his brows and forehead. He looked around the room, the same all black, dark grey, empty room. With a sigh he relaxed his posture and stared at the wall in front of him. The dream was nothing new, but it still haunted him the same as it had the first time it crept into his mind. He had dedicated himself to the Dark Side for certain, but (Y/N) was the only thing he truly regretted leaving behind. As Emperor however, he couldn’t let such a trivial dream slow him down. He had a galaxy to rule over, to bring order to. He looked over to the holopad next to his bedside, 5:00 AM. It was an hour earlier than his usual, but considering his sparatic sleep schedule, it made no real difference. With a day like today, an early start wouldn’t hurt him either. A day of yet more Emperial duties and relentless striving towards power. With a crack of his joints and one thorough stretch he forced himself out of bed.

* * *

 

Like an ominous storm cloud, Kylo marched to the docking bay, his black robes flowing with his every step. As the troops all stood at attention he made his way into the command shuttle, finding Hux at the top of the ramp tapping away at his datapad.

“What are the commands today from Supreme Leader?” his mechanical voice caught Hux’s momentary attention.

“Simple, give the people of Naboo what they truly need. Order.”

Kylo nodded, “Are the troops ready?”

Hux glared at Kylo as he hesitated from his typing.

“Questioning my soldiers again Ren?”

The two remained silent, glaring at each other. Almost every interaction between the two was like a fight for dominance, to prove who was the alpha male of this organization. To say Hux was livid that Kylo was Emperor rather than him, would be quite the understatement. He loathed the idea of someone as unpredictable and juvenile as Kylo ruling over him and the galaxy. After a few moments of tension Hux returned his gaze to the datapad and waved Kylo off.

“They’ll enter before you, and set the stage. Now go.”

With a slight shove to the shoulder Kylo passed Hux as he went to take his seat in the shuttle.

* * *

 

The sound of birds chirping, a sound you always loved waking to. It was peaceful, soft and welcoming as the sun shone through your room. You released a soft yawn as you looked over to your datapad, on the bedside table. 9:00 AM - Queen requests your presence in 1 hour… With a little shimmy you made your way out of bed and started your morning.

* * *

 

You entered the throne room, polished as ever in your burgundy uniform, as you watched the queen dismiss her handmaidens. She turned to you with a small grin as she gestured for you to come forward.

“Morning your highness.”

“Good morning (Y/N), how is my prized senator?”

You smiled at her sentiment, though she was considered a higher rank than you, she had treated you with nothing but the utmost respect and spoke to you more like a friend than an official. It might have been due to your similar age and youth, but she was truly your first confidant on Naboo.

“Just fine thank you, I was told you wanted me present for something.”

She nodded, “Ah yes, we have received word of a sudden summoning of the system’s senators. They did not alert us as to why, but they requested you be present.”

You nodded, “Of course, when would I need to make my leave?”

“Not until tomorrow, but I know you usually have better notice to prepare.”

“I’ll work with what I have your highness.”

She smiled at you again, “(Y/N) I’m sure this kingdom would be far less sane if you were not here. You’re far too good at what you do.”

You smiled warmly in return, “I try, I did learn from the best.”

Though you tried to stay humble on how successful you had been thus far as a senator, you didn’t mind at all boasting about your former mentor. The one and only Princess and General Leia Organa. Your parents were eager to send you her way, assuring your future would be somewhere successful. They had always wanted you to be secure. Leia Organa was the perfect mentor for such a desire in this galaxy. She had always doted on you, admired your determination to be the best and your positivity despite the odds put in front of you. Though she had nothing but good things to say about you, she also made note of how often you were late. Of course you could never truly tell her why. You knew she wouldn’t be fond of her son secretly seeing you, especially as a Jedi in training. It was the only part of your time with Leia you still wished you had done differently, spent more time with Ben and have been far more honest with her. Maybe, just maybe that would have saved him. You had no idea what had happened to him, other than realizing his nightmares consumed him.

“You most certainly did. Your work here makes her proud I’m sure.”

You suddenly heard the grand doors to the throne room burst open as one of the palace guards ran inside, panting. You and the queen turned your attention to his obvious state of panic.

“Liam what’s got you in such a frenzy?”, she asked as she stood from her throne.

“Your highness,” he panted out.

“The Order…the Emperor is here.”

With wide eyes you turned to see her expression, unlike you she was not faltering.

“Alert the people, get everyone inside and call the other guards.”

He simply nodded and ran back out of the room. She turned her gaze back to you, her eyes now showing her concern. You had heard the stories, all the terrifying stories from across the galaxy. Tales of the Emperor ranged everywhere from merely intimidating to horrifying, always depending on what resistance from the people he was met with. Though what made him even more terrifying was the mask, it was a known fact across the galaxy that only people in the First Order, or systems he had claimed had seen his face. It opened up a plethora of possibilities for the type of tyrant hiding under it.

“(Y/N), I want you to find my handmaidens and stay with them, they’ll be heavily guarded.”

“But your highness you need someone here to guard you. I have a blaster I’m capable of defending you and myself!”

Just as she opened her mouth to respond the doors swung open yet again. Slamming against the pillars next to them. The room instantly filled with a sea of white armor and the sound of clicking against the marble, almost drowning out the sound of people’s screams. As the troops approached the throne they all halted unanimously, all holding their blasters to their chests as they faced the queen and you. Within another instant they all shifted, splitting the crowd perfectly into half as they cleared a walk way. Just as the room fell hauntingly silent again you saw it. The cloud of black striding past his troops as he made his way towards the queen, a man with red hair and a chrome trooper not far behind him. As he reached about 2 yards from the throne he finally came to a stop. His mask peering at the queen from under his hood. “A pleasure to finally meet you your highness.” His deep mechanical voice sent chills down your spine, though you weren’t sure if it were from fear or something else.

“What business do you have here in Naboo?”

“Quite simple…I’m here to claim your planet as a part of my growing Empire.”

“This kingdom will not bow to you or the First Order.”

“You may wish…but I have my ways.”

“My people will not serve you, nor do they want to be held under your power.”

He sighed through the mask, clasping his hands behind his back.

“If that is the case…then we’ll take it by force.”

With a sudden shift in the air you saw the hooded Emperor turn his gaze towards you. The silver lining of the mask glaring at you as it just barely reflected your blank expression. You couldn’t tell what had shifted in the room, but it felt as though he was pondering something as he stared at you. You could only imagine what creature or man was scowling or deviously smirking at you from under that mask. His posture however relaxed, his shoulders dropping from their animalistic stiffness. He just barely tilted his head at you as if fascinated by you, causing you to gulp. He turned his attention back to the queen.

“I’ll withhold my forces and spare your people…if you’re willing to make a deal.”

She hesitated, simply nodding.

“Go on.”

“I will withdraw my forces at once, leave your people to their business, allow you to exist in peace, only taking some resources, with only one intel officer a month assuring you will not betray my Empire. All in exchange for one thing…a gift to me.”

Her eyes remained narrowed as she nodded once more. The mask returning its gaze to you.

“Your senator’s hand in marriage.”

Your body went stiff under his gaze, your mouth just barely opening as you felt your heart start ramming against your chest. His masked gaze didn’t falter for a moment, simply staring you down like you were his prey. From behind him you could see the red haired man scowl, as if disapproving of his decision. This must have been another one of the Emperor’s infamous impulse decisions.

“My senator?”

“Yes. She would make a most impressive Empress.”

“W-why me?” you stammered out.

You mentally kicked yourself for your wavering voice, you had so seriously intended to stay strong at least on the outside in this moment. He stalked towards you, his broad shoulders swaying over to you as he closed the space between you. With your body frozen in shock he gently caressed your cheek with one of his gloved hands. The leather just barely grazing your skin as you could feel your knees shaking. With the sheer proximity he had to your body you weren’t sure if the heat you felt rising in your skin was your own fear or his radiating body heat.

“I can’t think of a being more suitable to rule at my side…to bring new knowledge to my kingdom…to bear and mother my heirs.”

You could feel your heart pounding into your throat as the mask simply gazed at you. Though you couldn’t see his eyes you could only assume his eyes were scanning the entirety of your body with lust. His gloved thumb gently ran across your bottom lip.

“Surely you’d be a wonderful addition to my kingdom.”

You turned your fear striken gaze to the queen, her expression seemed conflicted. She looked to you with the utmost concern, her lips barely parting. The fate of her people and her kingdom all rested on her decision of what to do with you. You could tell by the way her eyes focused on you she was debating with herself as to what to do next.

“It shall be decided by her alone. It is her fate. If she consents…then you shall have my approval.”

You looked to her, trying to read her expression. You weren’t sure what she wanted you to do. Of course as your friend she would never hand you over to a strange man in marriage without your consent, but was she willing to run the risk of sacrificing her people for just you? You knew she had that big of a heart, she would never seal your fate without consoling you. This however was tricky, should she save one because that one was her friend or save her kingdom and sacrifice the one? The safety of Naboo’s people was now all resting on you. You thought over the consequences, realizing the choice of denying his request would surely end up with her and many citizens dead, anarchy and absolute misery for the planet. With tears slowly forming in the back of your eyes you released a wavering sigh.

“I…”

The guards and queen all kept their gazes on you, intently waiting for your response. You could feel the weight of everyone’s gaze on you. You gulped again as you shut your eyes.

“I consent…to your proposal.”

You could hear the silent gasps from around the room. Though there wasn’t many palace personnel present, the echo undeniably hit your ears. You looked to the queen again as her expression wilted to one of sadness.

“Good. We shall withdraw immediately, and notify you of our future operations your highness. As for you my new Empress, your kingdom awaits you.”

You bowed your head, biting your lip as to prevent your tears from falling. You had to leave here with a brave face and your head held high. Nobody could see you break, not this publicly.

“Surely you’ll let her say goodbye first?”

You turned to the queen to see her looking at you with empathy. She too was fighting back her emotions in front of this crowd. The masked Emperor looked between you two, simply nodding.

“Quickly.”

Without hesitation you walked up to her and brought her into a tight embrace. She comfortingly ran her hands up and down your back.

“Thank you…you surely sacrificed for your people. Please…no matter what…stay safe, and remember us all here.” she whispered into your ear.

A single tear started to push past your lashes as you took in a deep breath.

“I promise you I will. Thank you for willing to take the risk for me.”

She pulled away smiling, rubbing your shoulder.

“Anything for you (Y/N).”

She turned to the Emperor as she guided you a hand on your shoulder over to him. Her smile still solemn.

“Promise me your majesty…that you will only take the best care of my senator.”

He nodded in her direction, “Of course your highness.”

With one more solemn smile you turned to her as she released you from her grip. Your hand was instantly met with the feeling of leather as you jumped slightly. The masked figure took your hand and strided out the door at the same rushed pace he had before. You looked back again at your queen, her strong expression slowly fading as she watched you get dragged away to the shuttle. With her falling smile being the last thing you saw of her, the doors closed behind you.

* * *

 

As the ramp to the command shuttle opened you were met with the orderly marching of all variations of storm troopers and generals, similar to the red haired man you saw earlier who you discovered was named Hux. As you walked down the ramp, a line of troopers stood at attention as the Emperor, or your now husband, turned to the chrome trooper.

“Captain Phasma, show my Empress her new quarters. Alert the seamstress to her arrival so that she may bring her some gowns for the ceremony and her new closet. I will return to her in 2 hours.”

“Yes sir.”

As the voice left her mask you realized it was a female trooper. A part of you hoped she would let you confide in her, your entire life you had had at least one friend to speak to. Though it was far fetched you hoped she would take some pity on you as a woman herself for being put into this situation.

“This way your majesty.”

You nodded, following her shiny armor down the sleek black marble halls of the kingdom.

* * *

 

“Supreme Leader, to be fair I think his decision goes against your counseling in his Emperial duties.”

Hux projected his voice, leaning his head up so that he could see the hologram of Snoke in front of him in the dimly lit hall.

“Supreme Leader my decision was made considering only your counseling. Our Empire cannot carry on past this generation if we only rely on ourselves. And with Naboo trusting us to leave them at peace we give other systems the chance to strike a deal with us to our benefit. We only gain.”

Snoke ran his sickly looking hand over his face, his eyes lazily glaring at the two men in front of him. Within a moment he rested his hand back on the arm rest and leaned forward once again.

“General Hux, our Emperor Kylo Ren is indeed in the right. Though he should have seeked my approval first, he surely is assuring the future of the First Order with his new Empress.”

Hux glared at Kylo from the corner of his eye as Kylo simply grinned from ear to ear under his mask.

“But be warned Ren, if you do not have an heir within a considerable amount of time…we will be rid of her.”

“Yes Supreme Leader.”

* * *

 

The moments after Phasma left you, you flashing her a small smile, the second you heard the blast doors shut you fell apart. Falling onto the bed that was now supposed to be yours, your shared bed, you sobbed into the pillowy soft cotton. What had you done? You were married to a mystery man who held the reputation of being unforgiving, impulsive and generally a brooding presence. After about an hour straight of simply sobbing you looked up to see a rack of new clothes. Embarrassed you realized one of the maids had obviously walked in and heard you sobbing, deciding to leave you there with your sorrow. Wiping your eyes you tried to focus your vision on the clothes they brought you. It was mostly filled with gowns of extravagant gowns of black, red and dark grey. Peering just behind the black gown you also caught sight of what appeared to be night gowns, robes and some lingerie, making your gut sink. The fear of being a measely play thing for this strange man was growing worse. To think you gave up the position of senator in order to save your people for this. You started sobbing into the blankets again.

After a few moments of only your sobs echoing through the vast bedroom you heard blast doors open. You tried to silence yourself but couldn’t help it. If you deserved anything today it was the choice to cry as long and as hard as you needed. Just as you let out a deep breathe between sobs you heard the familiar sound of those boots approaching you.

“Why are you crying?”

His voice was no longer mechanical and actually somewhat soothing. You kept your face down in the sheets, afraid of what your gaze would be met with. You felt the bed shift next to you as he sat down.

“You know I hate to see you cry (nickname).”

You froze in your sobbing, there was only one person in all of the star systems who would call you that, who knew of that name. You looked up cautiously as you saw the figure in black robes finally unmasked. His raven black hair, the warm and intense brown eyes, the beauty marks all over his pale face like constellations, you knew him.

“B…Ben?”

His jaw stiffened at the name, but he nodded to you. You sat up further.

“How are you? …You’re…you’re the Emperor?”

He nodded, “When I left, when I told you no one understood…this is where I went. Who I became.”

You looked him over in shock, if there was one thing you had assumed in life it was that you would likely never see Ben again. Though it was somewhat true, seeing as the teenage boy you snuck around with was now an intimidatingly powerful man, you couldn’t believe it. A part of your nerves eased, though you were still hesitant with him.

“It’s Kylo Ren now…but I’m still here.”

“You…you used me to make a deal? You horrified me back there!”

Kylo’s expression turned glum for a moment as he saw you start to turn angry. Visibly flinching at your sudden rise in tone.

“I did it so we could be together. Finally. After all these years, and everyone trying to keep you away from me…I can finally be with you. No sneaking around, no lies…nothing in our way. Like it should have been. I thought I’d never see you again. I had to take you back when I saw you.”

“Be-I mean…Kylo…I thought I’d never see you again either. But, your plea…I don’t know if I can believe that. I’ve heard about what you’ve done.”

He gulped, simply staring at you with those same puppy eyes you remember from the past.

“You barged into a kingdom where I was respected and demanded my hand. Did you think about me, what I wanted at all?!”

You could tell by his expression he was internally deflating. He had finally found you again, he expected you to be relieved that the Emperor taking you for his own was in fact your past lover. This however was not what he expected. His lack of intimate emotion in years didn’t help him to convey those feelings either.

“…I thought I could provide better for you. You can have anything your heart desires here. You can have the galaxy. You’ll rule this galaxy by my side, not just hoping that people will hear your pleas at the senate hall for justice. I can protect you better than those palace guards. We can finally have a family together, like you always wanted. I did this for you.”

“For me?!! You basically bought me in a trade negotiation for your selfish desire! Do you realize that’s what this looks like?! Despite our past!”

He stared at you, his expression slowly turning solemn as he shook his head at you. You sighed with frustration. Though you werer passionate, and obviously in the right, you had sealed your fate here. If you defected now, he could do anything to Naboo to take out his rage. You brought your eyes back to him as you moved a strand of hair from your face.

“Be-…Kylo. I do…still…to some degree love Ben Solo-Organa. But I need to know if I comply with this to the fullest and sincerest degree…that he was the one behind this decision. …I will not comply happily if I’m just Emperor Kylo Ren’s lustful conquest. I need to know he’s still in there if I’m going to be the wife you think you’re getting.”

He turned more of his large frame towards you.

“What would you want me to do? I’ll do anything.”

You looked directly into his eyes, “Prove to me…who made the decision.”

He nodded. Hesitantly he lifted a single hand to your temple, staring deep into your eyes.

“You’ll feel pressure, but I assure you I won’t hurt you…only prove myself.”

You nodded. He placed the other hand to your temple as he focused all his energy on you. Within seconds your mind was filled with images you hadn’t seen in years.

_It was a time you remembered well, a week before Ben seemingly disappeared and decided to give you some heated kisses on your way to work with Leia. You both looked so enraptured, with each other. Suddenly the vision in your mind morphed you into an unsightly creature chasing after Ben, reprimanding him for his choices, taunting him. Then it morphed again, this time it was Kylo in his bed jolted awake by what was apparently a dream. Morphed again, this time Kylo was in a room, facing a deformed helmet, tears in his eyes._

_“Please grandfather…I know I have chosen this path…but please bring her back to me. I need to see her again..please”_

_His plea echoed through your mind as you finally felt the pressure, the image now of Kylo returning to bed, staring solemnly at the empty side of his giant luxurious bed. As he placed a hand to it, the vision suddenly jolted to a stop._

Releasing the pressure in your head. Breathing deeply you looked back to him, a new hint of empathy for him emerging.

“Ben…”

He swallowed, “I…I’ve dreamed about you almost every night since I left…I know I’m not the same. I’ve got a lot of sins to repent for…a lot of people I’ve disappointed. It may take me a while to get back there…but I’m still in here. I meant what I said. I still love you.”

You smiled sweetly at him, “I’m still upset with you and we have a lot to talk through before we get back to the way we were…but I’ll stay.”

He looked at you with those soft eyes, the ones you loved so much.

“That’s all I ask for.”

You cautiously placed your hand over his. He watched intently as you did, only to smile at the warm and gentle contact. You circled your thumb around the back of his hand.

“I meant what I said on Naboo too…there’s no one more suited to be the Empress than you. I wouldn’t want to do it with anyone else.”

You smiled warmly at him. You were still angry, still afraid of what this new life meant, but you knew in your heart you couldn’t leave Ben behind here. Though he was Kylo now, Kylo still needed you.

* * *

 

Deciding later that it was best to go forth with this, as you had in fact sealed your fate here, you obliged to attend a ceremony to celebrate your new marriage to Kylo. He paced the living room area of your quarters, waiting to see what you would come out in. Though he was sure the maidens had brought you something to coordinate with him in. He wore his black pants and high collared shirt but atop them he wore a black velvet cape like robe lined with gold fabric. Upon hearing the bedroom door creak open he stopped in his steps and looked up to see you. The maidens had in fact brought you a black gown, sleak and velvet like Kylo’s robe. Your neck was adorned with a thick gold metal choker, as your (H/C) was done up into a formal style. With a slight sigh he looked you over, just barely smirking at you. He walked over and gently took your hand in his.

“You surely are meant to be an Empress.”

You smiled as he guided you to the door, “Our subjects will be awestruck when they see you.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After you comply to Kylo taking you as his Empress your new life, though you were hesitant about it, becomes more enjoyable as Kylo goes out of his way to prove his love to you. Though he is swarmed with his new and growing Empire he tries to keep you feeling attended to and loved. Your marriage grows slowly, reminding you both of what you had wanted as teenagers in love. An unexpected turn of events against the Empire also bring you and Kylo closer together.

Being Kylo’s Empress to say the least, was a life of spoils. Kylo didn’t exaggerate when he told you he would provide you with only the best. He brought you everything from the smallest gems, to the most beautiful gowns you had ever seen. You insisted it was too much, but for him it was his way of trying to make up for all the years he had been missing and an attempt to let you know just how much he loved you. One of his attempts to swoon you over with gifts was his promise of an entire island, which you denied. Simply owning it for vacation was far too impractical. You also wanted more than just gifts from him, despite how endearing he was each time he gave you one. Approaching you with great hesitation, watching your face intently to gage your reaction.

Slowly but surely he became better at communicating with you, trying his hardest to convey his feelings and thoughts to you. As that evolved, he also made a good, but rusty, effort to be completely and openly honest with you. Understandably at first a lot of his truth was off putting and dark, but deep down you knew it wasn’t him alone. He was no longer the architect of his own story after he left home. Though his body carried out the deeds, you knew truly his mind was not his own at work. Lucky for him, you were one of the only people to understand that. It was nerve racking at first, had you on edge at first, but soon within only a few months, you could see the young man you once knew in Kylo. The sheer determination he had and displayed trying to be the man he knew you wanted was enough to make your heart swell.

Of course despite his great improvements, you were no fool to simply jump back into your romantic ways with Kylo. After considerable time however, you slowly started to get him as well as allow him to go beyond just simply holding your hands. The first nights you would just simply stare at each other from opposite sides of the bed, just talking, you eventually got closer. Eventually letting him hold your hand as you drifted off to sleep. Then closer as you finally allowed him to envelop you in his arms. Your kisses got deeper, the hugs tighter, the little gestures of affection more frequent. Months later, you both had finally reached the point of intimacy and romance you had wanted since you were teenagers at the Resistance. For someone as cold and awkward as Kylo, you felt fortunate, and somewhat proud, that you were the only person to bring out his softer side. To say the least, everyone in the kingdom was grateful to you for being the ultimate sedative to their ruthless Emperor.

Life was finally at a point where you felt as though this was truly a marriage with the man you undoubtedly loved, and no longer a forced arrangement. This is what you had dreamed about when you would giddly wait for him outside of Leia’s office years ago. You and Kylo now had a routine and a way of communicating and understanding each other that no one could interfere with. It was mental, emotional and physical. Not even Snoke could taint what you had, though he voiced no concern to do such a thing.

Even in your improved married life however, Kylo was still Emperor, and you his Empress. This new life and rank meant you served your Empire. Almost every decision you made or considered was going to in some capacity come back around to your people. The pressure seemed daunting at first, but with time it became less of a hassle. Kylo always consulted with you, discussing in detail the pros and cons of each one.

Then there were also the things that the subjects and the First Order wanted you to choose, no matter how long it took to convince you. One thing you had pushed on you, almost the instant you walked out of your quarters for the first time was one word, heirs. It seemed as though everyone and their mother that was involved with your Empire was dying to know if and when you’d get pregnant. Even your handmaidens would get nosey, trying to coax information out of you by telling you stories of their families, spouses and partners. Some people would even go beyond your level of comfort and start imparting their unwarranted advice, but being as cordial as you were, you’d simply nod. You received everything from a list of aphrodisiacs to give your doting husband when you were trying, to positions that were ‘undoubtedly going to get you pregnant’. Sure you wanted a family, one to call your own, but your subjects weren’t the people to understand that you had to focus on your marriage first.

Kylo knew everyone was waiting, including Snoke. Everyone was anticipating the day you’d finally emerge from that bedroom with a little bump under your gown. Despite the pressure on both of you, he so dearly appreciated that you wanted to focus on him and his relationship with you, first and foremost. Months later, you both decided to conciously try for that heir, to finally start the family you had always wanted to have with him.

Neither of you really intiated the conversation at first, until one night. The room was silent except for your heavy breaths, your bodies hot and sticky under your silk sheets as Kylo ran his hand absent mindedly down your side. Shifting himself down the mattress a little he placed himself where he could kiss your stomach. With the first soft kiss to the side of your belly you giggled, he continued his way across your stomach, his plump lips brushing against the soft skin. He layed his head down there, simply staring at your (Y/S/C) skin under his palm as he rubbed circles gently over your belly. Quietly you put your hand in his hair, just barely rubbing his scalp. You knew what he was subconciously trying to tell you. In that vulnerable moment, he finally opened up about his desire to have a family with you, heirs to his throne or not.

Now you sat in your quarters, in one of your luxurious robes, the moonlight from the window making the silk shimmer. You stood, sighing as it was now the fifth extra hour of waiting for Kylo to return from his mission. A few steps further you quietly crept across the floor to look down at your 3 month old daughter in her ornate gold crib, just a yard or two away from your own bed. The sight of her tiny frame wrapped snuggly inside plush blankets and peacefully in slumber brought a smile to your face. She was truly the light of you and Kylo’s Empire. If you thought Kylo spoiled you, he far exceeded those standards. The moment you excitedly told him he would have an heir he was more than elated and already fell in love with the little fetus growing inside you.

Though he still had his emperial duties to attend to, he found loopholes in each of them to cut them short and spend more time with you, assuring your health as well as the baby’s. He was also obsessively making sure all the staff was readying for his baby’s arrival, even though you hadn’t even been showing yet. Once she was born, it only increased, the first sight of her bringing tears of uncontained joy to his deep eyes. Just as he had promised you, he promised your little girl the galaxy, and practically gave it to her already. Her first days were spent surrounded by gifts from every corner of the galaxy, many of which still sat around her crib.

A sudden hiss from the blast doors caught your attention. You turned around to see Kylo, ripping his helmet off as he practically charged towards you. Pulling your hand carefully off of the crib you approached him with a grin. The instant he was within reach you put your arms around his neck tilting your head at just the right angle to place a soft kiss to his lips. After a moment he pulled away, resting his forehead against yours, looking into your eyes sincerely.

“How did it go?”

He quietly made a noise like growling as his jaw tensed, his eyes closing.

“Let’s not talk about the Empire…only what’s in this room…right now.”

You gently brought a hand to his cheek, carefully running your thumb down it. With a sigh just barely hitting your face he leaned into your touch, slowly opening his eyes again.

“Okay.”

“Thank you…I missed you.”

“I missed you too. I’m glad you’re home. (Y/D/N) was looking for you before I put her to sleep, she tried so hard to stay awake for you.”

He smiled, the softest huff of a laugh escaping his chest as he looked over to the crib a little ways away from you both. He brought his gaze back to you.

“Maybe now that she’s finally asleep…and I’m off duty..we can have some time together.”

He moved a strand of hair from your face, staring intensely into your eyes. It had definitely been a while since you and Kylo had spent any time off of your thrones and not running the kingdom. You bit your lip as he craned down, softly kissing your jawline. His lips worked their way gently and slowly down your neck. He nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck, forcing it to stretch further for him as he gave you one rough kiss to your sweet spot. As the slightest moan escaped your lips you felt his energy shift. Moving his hands to your hips he pulled you closer to him, his lips moving to yours hungrily. Deciding he no longer wanted to be patient he grabbed you from the back of your thighs, hoisting you up to his waist as he moved you back to your bed. Abruptly he dropped you onto the sheets as he quickly climbed his way on top of you.

“Ssshh.”

You whispered as you nodded over to the crib. Briefly he looked behind you both, he turned back nodding. Lust filled his eyes as he moved to slide your robe off of you. Complying with his physical request you slipped it off quickly onto the floor, moving your hands to quickly remove his robes as he admired your now bare shoulders. As his belt clicked open you threw it to the floor, he quickly shuffled his outer robe off of his shoulders. Before you could move onto the next piece of clothing, he pulled your night gown up to your hips, grinding his hips into yours, making sure you could feel his desire. As a gasp escaped you he looked deep into your eyes, deciding to do it again as he brought his lips back to you. Running a hand down his bicep you were slipping into euphoria. His hips bucked into yours again a little rougher as you gasped into his mouth. A seductive smirk flashed onto his lips. As he slipped into the same dream state his grip onto your hips grew tighter as he simply kept thrusting them into you. Moving your hands into his hair, your movement halted at the sudden sound of beeping and a static male voice came into the room.

“Emperor Ren. Your presence is requested.”

Stopping you both looked at each other, your smiles fading into frowns. You both panted as you stared into each other’s eyes. Kylo simply stayed like that for a moment hovering over you, taking you in. The static came through again.

“Emperor Ren.”

With a low and agitated grumble from his chest he pulled out the commlink from beneath his robes. He placed his thumb over a small red button on the side.

“In a moment.”

“We will ready for your arrival Emperor Ren.”

He sighed heavily as he looked at you, your hand gently tousling his hair. Instances like this were becoming far more frequent for you two. As the Empire grew, your time together, enjoying each others company was growing shorter and shorter. You knew Kylo resented his subjects for that reason. They kept him away from you, or put him on public display next to you, forcing him to supress what he wanted to say or do to you until later. You were not a fan of it either, but you understood why it happened.

“It’s fine..you have to go.”

He shook his head, his agitated tone now softer only for you as he brought his gaze to you again.

“I’m sorry…I don’t have nearly as much time with you as I wish did.”

You smiled at him, propping yourself up enough to kiss him softly.

“We have an Empire to run Kylo…it requires our time.”

He nodded as he reluctantly removed himself from you. The sudden loss of heat between you caused him to sigh and you to shiver as goosebumps ran up your arms. The second his feet hit the marble ground he regretted having his commlink on him. Just as he stood you both heard the quiet stirring of your daughter in her crib. She started to cry, only adding to Kylo’s sadness. The Empire had taken so much from him, though he was aware of what it brought him as well, he resented it for constantly making you both exhausted, tense and only seeing each other at meetings or just as you drifted into sleep. With your daughter in the picture now as well, he desired nothing more than time away from his throne in exchange for time lying on the bed next to you, (Y/D/N) craddled in your arms or in between the two of you, cooing as her curious eyes wandered. He so greatly feared missing out on the milestones in her life.

“I’ll get her Kylo it’s okay.”

He looked at you with a solemn expression for a moment, with a nod he made his way out of the blast doors as you pulled your gown down. (Y/D/N) wailed as you rushed to her crib, shushing her softly as you reached in and pulled her carefully into your arms. Admittedly you were still getting the hang of all of this, you weren’t really sure why she had awoken, or what she needed, but you would figure it out soon enough. Gently you started gently rocking her as you ran a finger gently across her cheek.

“Ssshhh, sshhh, it’s ok, mommy’s here. Mommy’s here.”

You placed her carefully onto you, lying her frail little head on your shoulder as you tried burping her. You gave her a few taps to the back, hoping maybe you’d relieve her. Still crying. Gently running your hand down her back you tried soothing her cries, but she only went on.

* * *

 

An hour later, after feeding her and having her craddled in your arms where she could see you, she started to settle down. You sat close to her crib, rocking her to sleep gently as her little cooing noises got softer, her little mouth stretched to release a yawn. As her small, round (E/C) eyes settled back onto you, you smiled at her.

“Hi honey.”

Her eyes started fluttering closed, her peaceful state making you warm from the inside at the sight. You placed a soft kiss to her little head as you went to put her back into the crib. Silent as the dead of night you held your breath for a moment as you gently placed her back into the crib with her blankets. Making sure to fold a few over her to ensure her warmth and comfort. You gazed down at her when a voice suddenly echoed out through the courtyard. Despite the echo, you couldn’t make out what they were saying. They were definitely frantic and loud, but their words seemed to meld together. Quietly you moved to the window to see what the commotion was about. The moonlight illuminated your face as you looked out seeing nothing. The voice had disappeared and the courtyard seemed dead, with the exception of an odd buzzing sound. Suddenly your wide eyes saw it.

A thick blaze broke out from a precise shot in one of the palace hallways. The shot had caught one of the tapestries on fire, filling the air with thick smoke. As you moved to get a better view you were suddenly startled by the sound of many blaster shots hitting a nearby corridor. Somebody obviously decided to take advantage of the First Order’s scheduled sleeping hours to attack. Hearing the zoom over the roof you looked up to see the Resistance flying in overhead, taking shot after shot at the palace. Noticing the sounds outside your window you realized they were getting closer to your room. (Y/D/N) started wailing again, obviously stirred awake by the closer shot that rumbled a few doors down.

Quickly you started fumbling around the room trying to remember where Kylo kept your blaster. It was taking too long to recollect and the shots were only becoming more frequent, you decided to move on. Quickly you grabbed one of your thicker fur night robes, you would more than likely need to get out into the snow if this didn’t stop. Rushing across the room again you tried to soothe (Y/D/N), making your way to her crib to wrap her in a thicker blanket. You were going to have to go find Kylo, he had always gone over the safety procedures of the kingdom with you 20 times over to assure you would never become one of the casualties. Whether you got into a TIE fighter or climbed underground into the shelters, you needed to assure (Y/D/N)’s safety.

Securing her tightly in thick blankets, you swaddled her close to you with a different fabric, ensuring she’d be close. Anxiously you started running for the door as a sudden blast hit one of your windows, causing you to flinch as the glass shattered into the room spraying across the marble a good 10 feet. (Y/D/N) cried out frantically as you got your footing back and rushed out into the halls. There was nothing worth staying in the room to save any of your possessions. The halls were filled with piles of random debris and troopers scurrying about with their blasters ready, generals frantically leaving their stations shouting orders, all the maids noticeably horrified. As your personal chamber maid saw you exit your room she quickly rushed over to you as she directed you with her shaking hands.

“Downstairs your majesty, you must go to the downstairs shelters."

With a nod you drifted past her, gently patting her shoulder. Making your way past the fearful expressions of your subjects you weaved through as you tried to get you and (Y/D/N) to safety.

* * *

 

Trying to escape the palace you held (Y/D/N) even closer to your chest, as if she could be stored inside of it. Finally you reached the downstairs, which compared to the upstairs was far worse. The walls had massive and flaring holes through them with ash collecting. The grand pictures of Emperors past were blown to bits across the room, many with sizeable holes through them. You quickly made your way past the debris and kept moving towards the exit. Rounding a corner to your left, one of the smaller pillars in the hall came crumbling down in front of you as you backed away. A wall behind you suddenly burst open with a buzzing green blast from a Resistance fighter pilot. The sheer impact of the shot blew through the other wall, shattering the mirrors. Flinching you covered (Y/D/N)’s head even more as you ducked out of the way, her crys were growing more desperate. The palace was slowly becoming like a maze of traps with every shot they took. Likely they wanted you to be in this situation, running for your life with difficulty as the palace fell apart. They wanted the Empire’s strongest players trapped inside.

For once in your life, you felt disgusted by the Resistance. Being Naboo’s former senator you would have never dreamed of saying such a thing, but your life had changed vastly since then. Of course you rarely agreed with things the Empire did, but it shocked you that an organization like the Resistance would do something like this. Murder seemingly innocent people, destroy people’s livelihoods and homes, corner women and children like you and your daughter. No matter what side you chose, they were all the same at this point. Backing yourself into a corner as another shot hit the hallway behind you, (Y/D/N)’s cries only got louder as you tried your hardest not to join her in her sorrow. You were strong, determined and witty, but you had your limits. War was a part of this Empire and politics in general, but this situation for you was different now. This was not something your little angel should have to live through, despite who her father may be to the Resistance. You felt responsible and guilty for her cries. Trying to hold back the tears you attempted soothing (Y/D/N) again.

“We’re gonna be okay baby. We’re gonna be okay. Ssshhh it’s okay, mommy’s got you. We’re going to be okay, mommy will keep you safe.”

You weren’t sure if you believed yourself as the words left your mouth. Truthfully you had no clue what this evening would result in, but you had to have hope of some degree. Your daughter needed you to have hope in this moment. The circumstances didn’t matter, she had to get out of this with or without you unharmed. It wasn’t an option to you.

As you watched the hall tapestry’s go up in flames in front of you, you suddenly saw a figure emerge, standing not too far away from you. You couldn’t make out its features, but you could tell it was looking at you. It wasn’t too tall, not burly or appearing to be an alien species. Keeping entirely still despite the chaos, it seemed unphased or shocked. Whatever it was, it seemed to be unmoved by the chaos. Your fear started to rise. If they weren’t afraid of the scene in front of them, they were likely not on your side, and would more than likely recognize you. As the smoke cleared a bit you squinted your eyes and finally saw the features of this figure. Your heart stopped.

It was Leia.

Your gut sank a little bit. Your mentor, the woman you once regarded as a second mother, was now at the oppossing side of this war from your own. Technically speaking, she was your enemy now. Though you weren’t force sensitive you swore you could feel her utter confusion and heartbreak at the sight of you here. There were so many questions, you could tell by the way her brows moved and her expression shifted.

On Leia’s end she froze in shock as she felt your presence in the room. She knew it was you the second she felt it. But why were you here and not on Naboo? You are their senator after all, why would you be with the First Order at their emperial palace? As the smoke cleared she saw you there, cramped into a corner now looking down at something, the anxiety obvious in your eyes and fear clouding your aura. That’s when she saw it, the sweet innocent baby swaddled tightly against your chest. The connection she felt going between you and the little bundle made her know without a doubt it was yours. It was a bond she understood more than anything. Something kept prying at her thoughts however, there was another kind of pull to the image in front of her aside from her connection to you. Realizing the other pull and connection she felt was in fact to the baby in your arms her heart only broke as it sunk deep into her gut. It was her grandchild.

Her son had a wife and child. He had finally married and started his own family. Both milestones in his life she had to watch as an outsider in this moment. Things she never imagined missing when she was watching him grow. She had dreams of what it would be like to see her son at the altar with the man or woman meant for him, tearing up as he took their hand. Or of her coming to aide him in the middle of the night when her grandbaby wouldn’t stop crying and he desperately needed sleep. Instead this was what she got. She so wished she could have shared moments like those with him. Give him the advice he would need, and get to tell him how happy she was for him. This cruel war for power had ripped that chance away from her. She looked to you glumly, guilt filling her entirely as she saw you trying to coax your baby amidst this mess. She could feel the panic rising in your mind as you tried to not cry and find your way out.

In an instant she rushed to the crumbled pillar, deciding to use the little physical force power she had at the moment for something she knew she wouldn’t regret. You noticed some of the rubble rolling out of the way, slowly tumbling forward in an odd motion. As your eyes went up you saw Leia much closer to you now with a solemn smile. She moved a few more stray pieces of rubble, clearing a way for you to escape. Coming to a stop she looked up at you with that same smile.

“He should be close by if you run out there now. He’s looking for you.”

With a sinking gut you smiled at her, a single tear glided down your cheek as you moved yourself over to walk out from your protective corner. Standing in front of Leia you both simply looked at each other, obviously not knowing what words to possibly say in this moment. In a way you felt as though you had failed her, joining the Empire, but at the same time you felt as though you wished she was happy for you. You were the reason her son ever had a smile on his face at this point that wasn’t sheerly out of pride or ego. You had brought him the affection and reassurance he so desperately needed, the companionship that silenced his nightmares, you even brought his child into this world. Leia should’ve been happy that someone was watching out for him.

“(Y/N)…just…take care of him, and..”

She tried to peek at the crying bundle of blankets against your chest, you just faintly twitched a smile.

“Her…(Y/D/N). I promise I will. …I’m sorry.”

Quickly you reached forward and brought her into a hug as she returned the gesture wholeheartedly. In the way she lightly gripped onto your back you could tell she was fighting tears and didn’t want to let you go. She so desperately didn’t want it to be this way. There was nothing she wanted more than to simply pack you and her son onto her Resistance freighter and take you home with her, have you both introduce her to her sweet grandbaby. She pulled away as one more stray tear pushed past your lashes and you let out a sigh. Swallowing the lump that had formed quickly in your throat you looked into her eyes sincerely.

“One day…I promise.”

She smiled again, nodding to you as you strode past her through the remaining expanse of the messy hall.

* * *

 

The snow gently fell onto your (Y/H/C) hair as you made your way out of the doors, trying to reach the shelters before any further damage was done. A part of you wanted to hijack a ship now, take your daughter and leave, but you also knew you had to find Kylo. He would rip the galaxy to shreds if he couldn’t find you or your daughter after an event like this. You couldn’t knowingly put him through emotional trauma like that. Carefully running through the snow you suddenly heard that familiar deep voice call out to you.

“(Y/N)!!”

Coming to a halt you turned to your right to see him in the snow. His helmet was missing, his hair messy, and his face visibly covered in sweat. The look in his eyes both relieved and saddened at the sight of you running with his child crying out desperately into your chest.

“Kylo!!”

Wasting not a moment more you ran towards him, your footfalls leaving a defined trail through the snow. He opened his arms wide for you as you slowed your pace and collapsed into them. Finally as his body heat hit you the tears flowed freely, his gloved hand brought your head into his chest as he rested his chin on top of it. A little drop hit your scalp softly as you realized he was crying too. The feeling of being this close to him again brought your pounding and sunken heart ease.

Sniffling he spoke, “I thought I lost you…I thought you were gone.”

You ran one of your hands up his back as you nuzzled your face further into his warm chest, hearing his heart pound against it.

“I thought I was going to lose you too. Thank stars I came out here.”

He started running a hand down your back as he spoke.

“It’s okay, we’re all okay now. The fighter pilots are retreating now, we’re okay.”

His jaw seemed to push further into your head as you felt more drops touch your scalp.

“I’m sorry…I’m so sorry…I put you both in this situation.”

“Kylo stop, you wouldn’t have known exactly when this was going to happen. All that matters is that we’re all together again, and we’re okay.”

Gently he moved you to look at him, placing either of his hands on your arms.

“I have the command shuttle ready…if you..”

His expression was sad, his warm brown eyes were dim but glittering with even more tears. By his tone you knew he hadn’t prepared it in the sense you only wished for it to be. He was dreading the next words he had in mind. Tensing your jaw you snapped at him.

“Kylo…I would never get on that command shuttle without you. I don’t care how bad it gets…I made a promise. …You’re stuck with me..”

Appreciating your attempt at humor in this situation Kylo grinned, leaning his forehead against yours. He looked down at your daughter, who’s frantic cries were now only whimpers as her little eyes darted between both of your faces. Your little family was safe. Shaken, but unharmed. That was all you could ask for from a night like this.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and his Empress try picking up the pieces of their kingdom after the attack, trying to start the process of rebuilding. As they take in the sheer volume of damage to their home, they also make a surprising discovery about their daughter, leading to a heated debate, and a possible rift in the family. Leia also returns to the Resistance, trying to digest the reality of being at war with her child, former student and infant grandchild.

Shuffling through the ashy piles of debris, huddles of storm troopers scanned the perimeter of the palace for any royal staff or salvagable belongings left behind. Their white armor, quickly collecting black scuffs from trying to navigate the remnants of what was left of the palace. To say the least, it was reduced to the bare bones of its structure. The entirety was now coal black, burnt to a crisp, steam still rising into the air. The ornate tapestries were now piles of dust with gold metal rods underneath them, the grand paintings now shriveled black canvases, the curtains all now reduced to thin strands of fabric blowing in the breeze.

The second floor was barely standing, with the exception of a few rooms still holding strong with what was left. The servants, lieutenants and troopers were all still shaken by the attack. Many still silently crying as they awaited the news of the survivors from the attack. Though the entirety of the First Order was aware of just how much of a target they were, nobody ever planned to witness attacks this severe. At least not in person. With a billow of his robes, Kylo moved swiftly and carefully up to what was left of the second floor.

Feeling the cold breeze brush against the fabric over his chest he let out a wavering sigh as he walked through a fractured doorframe. What once was your bedroom, where you happily resided with your Emperor and daughter, was almost entirely demolished. Though the marble floors still stood, the walls at least somewhat stable, it was like a ghost of the place you had so many memories in. Taking slow steps Kylo took in the bleak sight around him. He was relieved that you and your daughter were safe, but his heart ached just a little that your one home, the only one you had ever shared with him, was destroyed. He had already taken you from the only home you knew once before, and now, yet again, the home you had learned to love was ripped away from you.

All because of him.

Moving through the scattered shards of glass, Kylo made his way over to where your luxury bed was. Much like almost everything else in the room it was burnt to a crisp, and hardly identifiable. The only thing that set it apart to be identified as a bed was its square form. Gently Kylo sat down on the edge, running his leather clad hand over what would have been a soft comforter, now instead a charred black surface. Taking a moment more to lay his hand on the burnt remnants, Kylo reminisced on the times you had spent together on that once seemingly insignificant piece of furniture. The endless late night conversations, the comforting hold you would keep him in when he was startled awake by nightmares, the fits of giggles you’d break into as you tried hitting him with his feather pillows, the sweet bliss of watching your daughter’s small frame in between you with eyes wildly curious as they scanned from one end of the room to the next.

(Y/D/N).

Shifting his gaze up, Kylo looked to where you kept your daughters crib. Next to one of the blasted out window frames, it sat, also hardly recognizable except for the charred structure. Instantly Kylo moved towards it, removing himself from the bed. The thud of his heavy boots stopped in front of the once ornate crib, now shredded by the impact of a blast and charred from flames. Feeling the tears in his eyes well, he gently placed a hand on the remaining edge of the crib. In his worst nightmares Kylo had seen something similar to this. Had you not been awake, a lot more than the palace would have been ripped from Kylo. As you assured him constantly, material things could always be replaced. You were safe, and so was (Y/D/N), but for Kylo the possibilities of what could have happened still pushed their way forward in his psyche. Had you not been awake at the moment of the attack, he could have been looking at a lot more than the destruction of his possessions, he could have had to witness the carnage of his own family. He could have lived his absolute worst nightmare, and yet, by some strange stroke of luck by the force, he hadn’t. In his mind the only reason you were spared was because the force favored you, the light of his life, as opposed to him. Life was not suited to do someone like him any favors. Looking down to the ground, he just barely grinned as he saw a familiar and endearing sight.

Beneath a pile of ash were two of (Y/D/N)’s stuffed toys. Sniffling, Kylo crouched down low enough to pick them up in his large hands. As he looked down at them, he felt the tears build again. The cold breeze brushed against his pale face as he looked out over the open terrain that was now entirely visible from the floor of your former bedroom.

* * *

 

In one of the bomb shelters, one that remained solitary, you sat with your daughter released from her thick bundle of blankets. In her thick knitted purple pajamas, you looked down at her resting on your legs with an exaggerated smile.

“Hello beautiful!”

She giggled as she waved her chubby arms at you excitedly. Kissing her pudgy belly your heart swelled at the uncontrolable giggles that left her as she squirmed. Her tiny legs just barely kicking your upper thighs.

“Who’s my beautiful little princess?”

As her giggles died down you heard the door to your shelter unlatch behind you. Peering over your shoulder you saw Kylo walk in, dusting snow off of his broad shoulders. Carefully you sat (Y/D/N) up right on your lap, facing her towards Kylo as you turned.

“Look who’s here.”

With a coo (Y/D/N) reached her little hands forward towards Kylo, earning a grin from him as he approached you both.

“My favorite people in the Empire.”

He sat on the bed next to you, shifting the thin mattress with his weight.

“What did you see out there?”

Avoiding your eyes he ran his now bare hand through his raven locks, sighing heavily. Though he was aware that you could care less about the material possessions, he was not looking forward to delivering no good news. Even when things got questionable in the Empire, he always managed to have a balance of some positive news. This time however, was different and unavoidable. He brought his concerned gaze to yours.

“It’s all gone…There’s nothing left. The palace…and everything inside is beyond salvage.”

Silently you gulped, trying to focus on your daughter as Kylo continued.

“…I know you loved this palace…but we’re going to have to rebuild it from scratch. There’s no other way.”

You nodded, watching your daughter still reaching her small arms towards him. Of course you were upset that your home was gone, but in the same instance you could care less. You had your daughter, Kylo and yourself unharmed and together. That was all you really needed. Deep in the brown eyes staring back at you, you could see the flaring emotions. Kylo’s disappointment and frustration over the situation at hand were evident, as if he had failed you in some way. No matter how many times you reassured him you were okay with the life you led with him, he was constantly second guessing himself. There was no amount of consoling you could do after an incident such as this to convince him that anyone other than himself was responsible for what you had to witness. Clearing your throat, you shrugged with a faint smile.

“That’s fine. We can personalize the next one.”

Kylo scoffed at your attempt to look at the situation optimistically. There was nothing about the evening he had just lived through that he could even begin to chuckle at. It was all too real, too raw and too close to his nightmares.

“(Y/N)…you could have died. This isn’t a joke. That palace, or any palace you live in with me is a death trap.”

Furrowing your brows at his sudden snap in attitude, you remained still.

“Kylo-”

“No (Y/N). I ca-… I can’t have something happen to you or (Y/D/N).”

“So we won’t build a new palace. We’ll go live on a safer planet, maybe build a little house for ourselves underground like this shelter.”

(Y/D/N) cooed again, whimpering as she attempted to reach out to Kylo. With his solemn expression and furrowed brows he continued in his aggressive tone.

“The Empire needs a palace (Y/N). We employ people who need a place to live, to work. They need the palace like they need the Emperor. There will be a new palace…but it can’t house the Empress or the heir any longer. …The risk is too high. I can see it all too clearly now.”

Feeling your heart sink, you watched as Kylo shut his mouth finally, flaring his nostrils as he swallowed audibly, his eyes just barely welling with tears. He was obviously distressed speaking to you like this, but he felt as though he had to. He was beating himself up again. Not even a full 24 hours after the moment he told you a shuttle was ready and you denied. Even after your honest expression of dedication to him no matter what, he still insisted you leave. His lack of confidence in himself and his ability to protect you was clouding his judgement again. With the anger bubbling in you, you let out a hefty sigh as you narrowed your eyes at Kylo.

“The Empress will go wherever she damn well pleases. Just because one attack happened to hit the palace doesn’t mean it’s all over.”

“(Y/N), you don’t understand.”

Your daughter whimpered again, squirming in your hold.

“Excuse me? I understand perfectly well, your self depricating psyche is causing you to assume the absolute worst before you consider the reality you’re in at this moment or anyone else’s take on what happened.”

“It doesn’t matter what you think about what happened, it happened and it almost killed you, that’s what matters.”

(Y/D/N)’s whimpers grew louder, but you continued your debate, unable to believe Kylo was doing this once again before you even had time to process what happened after that attack.

“It does matter what I think Kylo. This is an Empire and while you may be the Emperor I am the Empress. You are no longer alone on that throne. As your WIFE I refuse to leave just because you’re worried.”

“(Y/N) I’m thinking about your safety.”

You could hear his tone growing more rigid. (Y/D/N) started squirming more aggressively as your tone started growing louder.

“To hell with safety Kylo, I knew what I was getting into the second I stepped foot into this palace.”

“Nobody was blowing the palace to a pile of ash when you arrived (Y/N). Your dillusion over this is ridiculous.”

As if hearing the snap in your mind, your jaw clenched. That was it, holding (Y/D/N) firmly you finally let your anger release.

“DILLUSION?! Look who’s talking!”

“Why are you so angry about the fact that I care about whether you live or not?!!”

“Because you aren’t even taking what I want into consideration!!”

“Why should I?!”

“Are you serious?!! I’m your WIFE!! That should account for something other than a title!!”

“I’m just trying to keep you safe!!”

“You can keep me safe and consider what I want Kylo it’s not impossible!!”

“It doesn’t matter what you want if it’s going to kill you!!”

“IT DOES MA-!!”

Your eyes suddenly went wide as your words locked in your throat. The sight in front of you causing you and Kylo to both freeze in shock. (Y/D/N), your only 3 month old infant, was sloppily levitating one of the toys Kylo had brought back from the bed you were all seated on. Her whimpers of frustration were clear as her small hand continually attempted to reach it. The harsh movements she made with her hands caused the toy to shake in the air like a rag doll. Both you and Kylo kept your eyes locked on her, the hangar falling completely silent other than the sound of (Y/D/N)’s strained whimpers. With a few more aggressive shakes of her left hand she finally started crying in frustration, not being able to get the toy in her grip. As you soothed her, running a hand gently down her back, Kylo slowly handed her the toy. Seeing it in her line of sight, she finally calmed down, quickly snatching it from his hand as she took into her small fist and started gnawing on the plush fabric. Bringing your gazes to meet, you and Kylo both stared quietly.

“Did…did she just-”

“Yes.”

Glancing down for a moment you watched as (Y/D/N) made barely any noise, still gnawing on the ear of her Ewok plushie. It was to be assumed that any child you had with Kylo would be force sensitive, something you were anticipating to eventually encounter. Realizing she had powers at this age however, changed everything. Her inability to control her powers at such a young age could hurt those around you as well as herself. Kylo seemed to stare at her, as if in a trance. A part of him was in complete disbelief at what he had just witnessed, the other part growing into concern for what that meant for his tiny daughter. She was far too young to train. Left untamed however, her power could do more than just minor damage.

“Kylo…what do we…what do we do? I’ve never dealt with this before.”

Gulping Kylo looked at (Y/D/N) who seemed to be distracted with her toy.

“Kylo?”

“We do nothing.”

Furrowing your brows you glared at Kylo.

“What?”

“You heard me.”

Clenching your jaw again you were getting ready for a second round of arguments with Kylo. Sensing you about to raise your voice again, Kylo put up one finger to hush you.

“We do nothing, for now. There’s nothing I’m remotely trained for in terms of training an infant. She’s far too young.”

“Oh…I see. She won’t…hurt anyone will she? …Or herself?”

Avoiding your eyes Kylo just watched (Y/D/N), who was returning his stare with her curious eyes.

“I can’t predict that.”

“Kylo-”

“(Y/N), she’s too young. …She needs time. We’ll just…we’ll keep her in the palace. She’ll be away from others and safe with us.”

You adjusted her tiny frame on your lap as Kylo kept eye contact with her. Trying to gage his feelings you decided to bring the topic up again.

“So…you’re not sending us away?”

Bringing his eyes back to yours, you could see the glum appearance they held. He was riddled with guilt. Guilt for putting you in harms way by having you as the Empress, for endangering your daughter’s life as his heir, for impulsively suggesting you leave his side and no longer live in your rightful home, and now for passing on his potentially dangerous powers to your little daughter. He only wanted what was best for you and your safety, to simply keep you untouched by the backlash he had brought upon himself. Despite your loyalty to him, he absolutely dreaded the idea of you facing any reprecussions from his violent, often disputed and aggressive actions across the galaxy. Shaking his head just slightly, he kept his eyes locked on you.

“As much as I hate it…you need to be close to me…especially with (Y/D/N). She’ll only get stronger with age…and eventually training.”

You nodded as he gently stroked a finger down (Y/D/N)’s little arm. She cooed at him, still gnawing at her plushie.

“I guess we’ll have to live through the reconstruction…are you sure you don’t want to leave? You can return to me when it’s properly suited for you.”

You shook your head with a faint smile.

“…I won’t let you go through this alone.”

Smiling at your sentiment he reached a hand forward and laid it atop yours.

“…You still want to be a part of this Empire?”

You nodded, “So long as you’re a part of it…yes I do.”

* * *

 

In a solemn silence, Leia sat in the corner of the central command room. Leaning against the wall with her arms crossed over her chest, she blankly stared at the floor. The room around was bustling, people cheering over their success with setting the First Order back, hugging each other in elation, others still debating over the politics of the situation. She wasn’t sure how she felt, not from the wreckage she left, but the family she left in it. There were so many unanswered questions she had conjured up just from the sight of you. How did you end up marrying her son? Why did you leave Naboo? How long had she been unaware her son had a wife? Would she ever see either of you again? Would she ever formally meet her grandchild? Would she be forced to only interact with you through combat? Suddenly breaking her concentration, a familiar voice appeared.

“General Organa! What wonderful news, so glad to know you were successful.”

Bringing her gaze up, she just barely flashed a grin at C-3PO.

“Yes thank you.”

Taking note of her softer tone and drooping eyes C-3PO stepped closer to her, hesitantly placing one of his metal hands onto her shoulder.

“General…is there something wrong?”

“…I’m not sure I can continue fighting the First Order in this way 3PO.”

“Why not General?”

Sighing Leia looked around to assure no one was in too close of an ear shot. Though many members of the Resistance were aware that her son was in fact the feared Emperor, almost no one acknowledged her still conflicting feelings. Of course she knew the First Order was wrong, but in the same instance, she knew her son was more of a forced participant than a willing one. Had anyone in the Resistance heard her give him that much credit, they’d likely have her admitted. Nobody quite understood her unconditional love for her son, despite the ruthless Emperor he had grown to be.

“…He has a family 3PO. I saw them.”

Bringing his golden head up as if he were looking out into the distance C-3PO kept his hand resting on Leia’s shoulder.

“Ohh…I see your dilemma.”

“I can’t justify missions to kill him, not when he has a child.”

Just the thought alone was enough to break her heart. He wasn’t just her child anymore, he was now a husband and a father. Any attack on the same scale as the one they had just carried out, on her command, would likely destroy all of that. She couldn’t bare to live with herself if she was ever responsible for the death of her son, tearing him from the life of that young infant. Nor could she be responsible for killing his family, sentencing him to a life of even more severe and toxic depression.

“But General Organa…the Empire.”

She sighed, “I know…that’s where I don’t know what to do.”

“Might I suggest possibly…striking them a deal?”

“He won’t take it.”

“Oh…alright. Maybe a compromise…at least with yourself.”

She considered his words for a moment. Mulling over what that would possibly mean in the scheme of things. Just a few moments later, Poe approached the two looking between them.

“3PO, General.”

Leia nodded.

“Oh hello Mr. Dameron. Congratulations on your mission.”

“Thanks 3PO! Couldn’t have done it without the General.”

Feeling her gut sink, she tried to hide her solemn feelings behind a faint grin.

“General, our attack may have set them back, but we’re likely going to have to go again. What are your thoughts on our next move?”

Releasing a deep breath, she looked to the center console, illuminating an image of the planet her son was likely residing on at this very instant.

“We wait…when they have rebuilt. Then we move.”

“But General Organa-”

“I quite agree with her suggestion, they will expect anything sooner.”

Poe looked between the two again, as he just barely nodded his head.

“Trust me on this Poe.”

He cleared his throat, “Um…alright. As you wish General. Thank you.”

Nodding to Poe once she watched as he walked back over to the huddle of pilots, all still celebrating. Bringing her gaze back to C-3PO he released a robotic sigh.

“Well…it is a compromise General. I’m sure you’re making the right decision.”

“…I hope so.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time passes after the destruction of the Emperial palace, putting the Resistance and First Order at a type of cease fire. As the Resistance plans their next move to hopefully end the First Order entirely, the First Order only gains strength as they rebuild, filled with vengance. Kylo and his empress live through the reconstruction, thinking everything has turned around for the better, until one afternoon.

_5 years later…_

It was astonishing to say the least, the silence that overcame the galaxy as the Resistance and First Order called a ceasefire. The years had passed and by some odd chance, the two had quietly ceased their attacks. As the silence between them settled however, it was more than obvious that the worst had yet to come. The tension undeniably making them like two predators waiting to strike, but first lurking through the grass, waiting for the next move. As the Resistance maintained it’s same power and gained more and more recruits, Leia formulated plans with her team, finally coming up with something that would likely end it all. She hated to think of what would potentially happen to you, her son and her grandchild, but she knew it had to be done. Despite Kylo being her son, he was still reigning terror across the galaxy and at the end of the day, his political decisions were in the wrong. Though her plan often tried to accomodate a sly way of sneaking you all out, she knew it was far fetched. Even with your prior ties to Naboo, you were now loyal to Kylo and Kylo alone. Where he went you went, and what he did, you tried to support. Any plan of sneaking him away would likely fall flat as well considering how scarcely he trusted anyone other than you. Anything Leia formulated, he would doubt and second guess.

* * *

 

Meanwhile, at the Emperial palace, things were rapidly growing and improving as the days went by. Over the years since the fateful attack on the palace, the First Order had only grown stronger. With all of the technology and majority of the weapons reduced to ash, they saw an opportunity to innovate. Even with the palace in construction, they had managed to develop all kinds of new weaponary, infrastructure and military tactics. To say the least they were prepared, and waiting.

As the Empire regrew, growing stronger everyday, you and Kylo overlooked the construction of your new home, approving and turning down one thing after another. With how much went into it, you had almost forgotten how fortunate you were in the previous palace, to simply move in. Every last bolt and floorboard had to pass Kylo’s approval, only adding to the stress and responsibilties that came with running the Empire prior. To say the least, Kylo was under insurmountable stress, even with the cease fire, he knew the next move the Resistance made would not be small. One way or another, he had to upstage them, he had to assure that the Empire did not crumble because of one blow. Seeing you and your daughter almost ripped from his grasp changed his outlook on the situation entirely. First it filled him with far more vengance than he had ever had prior, but it also reminded him that you were all only mortal. As strong as he was, there was only so many places he could be, so much he could do to protect you from the galaxy around you.

The mission to assure your safety went into every part of the palace, assuring this one was far more equipped for whatever was to come next. The walls thicker, the windows denser, the gold accents assured to hold steady with durasteel and weapons of all varieties in every corner. Tapestries were removed from the walls, things that were often flammable converted to things that would not be set aflame so easily. If anything, the palace became even colder than you had remembered it appearing prior. The walls were mostly barren, the marble traveling further up from the ground, going into the walls. The paintings replaced with holos, the halls hauntingly sparce and yet crowded with people. In a way, it seemed as though Kylo were filling the space that your possessions once took with personnel. Though despite the colder appearance of the palace throughout, he did keep one space sacredly ‘lively’ in appearance. Your quarters.

The only space in the whole expanse of the palace that had any real decoration to it. Even the throne room remained rather scarce in comparisson. From the door to the large windows allowing in light, Kylo assured that your quarters felt like a home. Considering how bleak the palace itself as well as the outside space was around you, he knew you needed something around you ro feel warm and welcoming. Just like the rest of the palace they were fitted with thicker glass windows, durasteel infrastructure and new security, but it was adorned with anything and everything you and (Y/D/N) desired. Now old enough to have her own room, (Y/D/N) was built a room which Kylo filled with her favorite things. Whether it was toys, dresses, even relics he happened upon on missions, she had it. Similarly, due to his guilt after the attack had insinerated everything you ever owned, Kylo filled your room, your closet and every jewelry box you possessed with spoils. Though he knew, much like when you were first with him, that material things wouldn’t fill any void, he hoped it would assure you he still cared. No matter how much the Empire took of his time, he assured that you and (Y/D/N) were cared for. Whatever time he did have to offer, he would give to the two of you. Moments you all cherished whether in the early morning or the latest evening hours.

Mornings much like the one you had now. Mornings with no meetings, no responsibilities or commitments. Just peace, quiet and still. Nothing but the sound of easy breaths and the faint humming of machinery. Laying in bed, with Kylo’s arms securely around your waist, you slept peacefully. With how much the Empire had been expanding, you and Kylo had hardly gotten a chance to relax. The reconstruction of the palace, as well as the rapidly growing fire power and prowess of the Empire made your time together even more scarce. All of that time apart only made moments like this sweeter for you, bringing you and Kylo peace and ease.

Quietly, (Y/D/N) pushed the door to your bedroom open, peering in. Her eyes slowly scanned the room, assessing that no one and nothing else were present in the room. Cautiously, she tip-toed over to you, her movements highly calculated and tense. Though she was still too young to understand just how tired you and Kylo truly were, she knew you both treasured sleep more and more these days. Stopping at the end of the bed, she froze entirely as she heard Kylo shuffle in his sleep. The covers rustled with a faint groan from his chest escaping as he moved. To her relief, he only nestled his head further into the pillow, keeping his grip around your middle as he fell still once again. With a sigh, she started her cautious steps once again. Her small limbs made long stretches, her arms hunching at her sides as if they would knock something over in her small venture. Cautiously holding her breath, she crept her way to the side, checking between the ground and you to assure she had not awoken you yet. Making it to your side of the bed finally, she stood on her tip toes, assuring she could clearly see you. Your eyes were shut, eyelids peacefully resting as your chest rose and fell, Kylo’s arm still locked around your middle as his face hid behind your head of (Y/H/C) hair.

“Mommy?”

With her voice hardly above a whisper, you couldn’t hear her in your deep sleep. Carefully she pulled at the covers, just faintly nudging the fabric under your torso.

“Mommy.”

Still nothing. She leaned onto the bed, whispering a little louder as she tugged at your pillow.

“Mommy.”

Still nothing except for your faint movement of your head, nestling into your own pillow like Kylo had. Releasing a deep sigh, she decided to walk back out of the room. She knew better than to wake you or Kylo when you got to sleep-in, and in consideration of how you usually handled things, she knew she’d get what she wanted if she just went off and did it. With a little smirk, (Y/D/N) slowly made her way back to the living room, taking the same dramatic but silent steps. Making it to the doorway, she cautiously turned back for a moment. Once again, you and Kylo were entirely motionless and definitely deep in sleep. As her smirk reemerged onto her face, (Y/D/N) quietly closed the door behind her as she made her way out.

* * *

 

Finally reaching the outside, (Y/D/N) trudged through the snow with her jacket tightly wrapped around her and encasing her with warmth. The winds for the most part had ceased for the afternoon, making it far more bearable to be outdoors. (Y/D/N) had begged you and Kylo time and time again to let her go outside, but everytime you insisted to go with her, it only displeased her. Even at her age of only 5 years old, she craved freedom. Deep inside, she knew she was no ordinary child, though she had seldom ever interacted with other children, let alone seen them. She knew there was something out there that she was missing out on, and she desired nothing more than to discover just what that was.

The first leg of her walk outside exposed her to nothing but the trees, beautifully accented with the white snow. Without you guiding her this time, she realized she was walking into a different part of the palace property she had yet to discover. This part of the palace seemed more on the rural side, with no sight of staff in the area, nothing she could sense in her immediate vicinity. Slowly she began to make her way past the trees, almost hesitating to go any further. Freedom was surely what she craved, but she still feared being separated from you and Kylo. Even with independence, she was far too small to defend herself should something or someone stronger and more volatile than her should approach. Just as she stepped away from the trees, she noticed a few figures further ahead, the dark attire contrasting drastically from the white snow. Squinting her eyes she focused her vision forward, trying to make out what the darker figures. The second her narrowed eyes confirmed the sight, a grin grew across her face. It was other children, perfectly around the same age as herself. From the sounds echoing through the vast clearing, she could tell they were enjoying themselves laughing and playfully yelling out to one another. Though she couldn’t see their faces clearly just yet, she could have sworn she felt their joy from where she was standing. As if it was a physical feeling, she could have sworn she sensed their jubilant smiles and excited frolicing. Deciding to waste no more time she went running towards them, her arms excitedly swinging as her dark raven hair bounced on her shoulders.

She could only imagine what fun she was going to have, how she would excitedly come home and tell you and Kylo about her new friends. You had never openly discussed how you wished for her to find children of her own age to play with, but undeniably if she found friends of her own she was certain you would be so proud as well as relieved. Coming closer to the children, she saw them all turn their attention towards her, all their brows furrowing. The expressions could have been read as hostile, but she could sense they were only curious, hesitant to see a new face.

“Hello!”

Hearing her chipper tone and the warm smile adorning her round face the children eased up, returning her same smile.

“Hello.”

One other little girl, this one with blonde pigtails and rosey red cheeks from the cold tilted her head the slightest.

“Have we met you before?”

(Y/D/N) shook her head, her smile still remaining on her face.

“No, my parents don’t let me go outside a lot.”

The kids all nodded, seeming to take on an empathy for her. One of the little boys shrugged, his curly brown hair shifting with his movements.

“Parents.”

(Y/D/N) giggled, “Yeah.”

Another little girl spoke up, returning (Y/D/N)’s wide grin as she practically hopped in excitement with her wildly curly light brown hair bouncing in the motion.

“You wanna play with us? We were just starting a snowball fight!”

(Y/D/N) tilted her head, her brows furrowing as she tried to recollect if she knew what that was. Generally when she went outside with you and Kylo, you both typically remained on a familiar walking path, only occasionally veering off.

“Snowball fight?”

They all nodded, all of their faces taking on various grins of excitement.

“It’s when you bunch up snow and throw it at other people.”

(Y/D/N) grin grew once again as she considered what that would look like. Hopping in place she excitedly nodded.

“Yeah I wanna play!”

The girl with curly hair excitedly motioned (Y/D/N) to her.

“Come on then! You can be on my team!”

(Y/D/N) eagerly nodded as she ran up to her.

“My name is Alanna, what’s your name?”

“(Y/D/N).”

Alanna smiled, “That’s a pretty name.”

“Thank you, so is yours.”

One of the boys from the other side yelled out.

“Ok stop chit chatting, it’s time to play!”

The kids all on (Y/D/N)’s side rushed towards a small pile of what appeared to be spheres of white. Seeing them, (Y/D/N) finally clicked.

“Ohh that’s a snowball.”

Just as the thought came together for her, she was hit with a cold blast to the arm, splattering across the fabric as she flinched. She instinctively held her arm, her brows furrowing as she looked up towards the other side.

“Hey!”

Alanna giggled, gesturing for her to join the group.

“Come on (Y/D/N)! We need to fire back!”

(Y/D/N) excitedly ran to them, standing somewhere in between the group, unsure what to really do. Watching her new friends throwing their mounds of snow however, she quickly caught on. Taking small notes of how they gripped onto the cold snow and how their arms flung forward, she soon realized how this all worked. As a smirk grew across her face, she joined the group, picking up a snowball and throwing it in the direction of the other kids. Watching it fly across and hit one of the boys in the leg, (Y/D/N) gasped. Feeling the giddy joy slowly rise within her, she happily clapped her hands. Quickly wanting to feel the same rush of joy and pride in her successful throw, she picked up another, tightly gripping it in her palms. Walking a little further forward, she threw another, only to watch it fly over the other childrens heads. Her shoulders slumped as she groaned.

“Throw another one (Y/D/N)!”

She turned to look at Alanna, wanting to see her friend encouraging her when she was suddenly hit with a blast of cold. Much like the one that had been thrown into her arm, this snowball was thrown with force and hit with an impact only increasing the ice cold burn against her flesh. Placing a hand to her cheek she gasped once again.

“Ow!”

Just as she was about to face the other side, ready to throw another snowball their way, she was once again hit with a forceful blow to the chest. Huffing out a breath, she took a step back lookin down at her jacket. Groaning in frustration at the splatter of snow on her jacket she reached down to grab another snowball. As her hand finally gripped one of the cold spheres, she was instantly hit with yet another cold blast to her side. Like the ones before, this one was forceful, hitting her harder than any mound of snow should have. Crouching suddenly, (Y/D/N) looked to her side, knowing she would likely have to answer to you as to why her good jacket had been soiled. Sitting close to the floor however, she realized just how hard the mounds of snow had hit her, suddenly feeling the impact as the temporary chill of her flesh subsided. Had they had rocks in them?

She shook her head, wanting to continue. Turning towards the other side, wanting to see what was going on (Y/D/N) turned her gaze, only to freeze. In the sudden moment of fear, (Y/D/N)’s eyes went wide, not knowing what this larger boy was going to inflict upon her as she saw him finally. Unlike the other children he towered, and was not built nearly as lanky as the others. Watching him closely, she watched as he carefully worked a snowball in his palm into a perfect circle, a look of determination in his eyes. Considering every cluster of snow that had hit her from his hands hit her hard, she was already anticipating the pain that was going to come with this one. Watching the ball fly from his grip, spinning towards her she quickly put up her hands.

Attempting to block her face, she pushed her arm out forward with her palm flat, hoping to stop the snowball short. Quivering in anticipation she sat crouched to the ground until she heard a sudden yelp. Turning her gaze from where she was crouched, she looked to see the larger boy flying back into a tree, his back colliding with it in a harsh thud. Falling just a few feet from the air, his body took another considerable thud earning a groan from him. Slowly she lowered her arms, realizing the snowball was no longer a threat. As her arms lowered to her sides she noticed all of the children turning towards her, the shock and growing fear obvious in their eyes. Slowly, all of the children began to back away from her, their expressions all melding into one collective look of fear. One of the little boys pointed to her, his hand trembling as he did.

“You hurt him!”

Her expression fell, her brows furrowing as her lips fell open.

“N-no I didn’t.”

The little girl with short black hair nodded, tears falling from her hazel eyes.

“You did this!”

“What’s wrong with you?!”

“You used the force!”

They all collectively gasped, huddling even closer together as they kept their eyes cautiously on her. The waves of suddenly petrified fear hit (Y/D/N) heavily as she stayed in her one place, unsure of what to do. The more she felt their negative emotions projecting onto her however, the more she felt herself growing unsettled. This was not supposed to happen in her first venture out of the palace.

“You’re the Emperor’s daughter!”

Seeing their petrified faces, (Y/D/N)’s heart began to plummet, realizing this was turning into something she had not anticipated. Between the fear she felt within them and the way their eyes all shifted from welcoming to fear striken, she was slowly sliding into a solemn state of mind.

“S-so, so what?”

Alanna leaned forward as her face turned to a scowl, heavily contrasting the happy face (Y/D/N) had been greeted with as the little boy contined to pull her back, the fear playing in his pupils.

“Freak!!”

“You’re a weird freak!”

“You’re just a monster!”

“How could you hurt him?! You are a monster!”

“Go back to your palace princess!!”

“Who even let you out?!”

(Y/D/N)’s heart plummeted even further into her gut, feeling as though it were going to weigh her down further onto her knees. The people she thought she was going to gain acceptance from had, within the blink of an eye, turned on her and were taking her down with everything they had to verbally offer her.

“Why you don’t stay there!”

“Don’t they know to keep you locked up?!”

They all laughed as one of the boys threw another snowball at (Y/D/N), hitting her square in the face. With the ice cold substance falling from her face as she winced her eyes shut for a moment, their laughs only grew more cynical. Bottom lip quivering, (Y/D/N) felt herself growing overwhelmed from the pain of rejection, from the waves of anger and mix of fear hitting her from the other children steadily. Unable to take it any longer as tears began to slip down her cheeks, (Y/D/N) quickly picked herself up from the ground and ran as fast as she could back to the palace.

* * *

 

Kylo was pacing the room, his face pulled into an expression of deep concentration as you sat on the bed, clutching your chest as it suddenly became harder to breathe. When you had awoken, (Y/D/N) was nowhere to be found, her sheets pulled aside and her door creaked open. Though you knew she would likely be fine, the given the history of the palace and the reality that was the environment you were in it was only natural to assume the worst.

“Where could she have possibly gone Kylo? She’s only been around the palace. She doesn’t know where she’s going unless we’re with her!”

“I can sense her presence, I just don’t know where in the palace.”

You put a hand to your forehead, releasing a deep breath.

“Stars Kylo what if she’s in a room with weapon testing, or combat training? What if someone isn’t familiar with what she looks like and throws her into a cell or puts her with the storm trooper program? There’s so many things that could happen to her.”

“(Y/N), I promise you nothing is going to happen to her.”

“You never say that when she asks if she go off on her own.”

Kylo snapped his head towards you, the look of anger making itself well known in his features.

“I’m trying to be optimistic for once dear, go with it would you?”

You shook your head, sighing as you tried to even out your breathing once again. For how sheltered your daughter was, you were not nearly in any way prepared to suddenly lose her. With the many people and creatures that had a price on Kylo’s head, you also couldn’t risk her being out of your sight before she was old enough to fight back anyone approaching her. Kylo huffed faintly, turning on his heel as he started walking towards the doors.

“I’m going to go find her.”

You nodded, “Please Kylo, if you find her first don’t scold her, just bring her back safely.”

He nodded as he was about to slip his helmet over his head, pressing the controls for the blast doors. Just as the doors opened however, he was instantly met with a small weight colliding into his legs, tightly clutching onto them. Looking down he saw (Y/D/N) pressed into him, her small body shaking and heaving as small sobs escaped her. The amount of pain and sadness that washed into him from her bringing him to a halt. From your place on the bed you leaned over to see her before Kylo, gasping with relief as you stood.

“Thank stars you’re back!”

Kylo’s brows furrowed as he crouched down, carefully pulling (Y/D/N) away so she could stand in front of him. Gently placing his hand on her shoulder, he looked into her red puffy eyes as her nose ran, her cheeks stained with tears. The emotions he felt rippling into him only breaking his heart as he saw obviously pained his child was. Her eyes were so swollen it appeared as though she had been crying for a siginificant amount of time.

“What happened?”

Suddenly hearing the sound of her sobs, your brows furrowed as well, unsure of what was going on. Wasting no time you made your way over to them, crouching down next to Kylo as you looked at her with concern. Taking in her appearance, your empathy instantly took over, seeing the hurt playing out in her body language and expressions. She gasped for air, releasing another sob before she attempted an answer.

“I tr-tried to pla-ay with the kids a-and they ki-icked me out.”

You arched a brow, knowing well that no one other than you and Kylo kept children in the palace itself.

“Other kids?”

She nodded, dipping her head with another heaving sob.

“O-outside.”

Kylo reassuringly rubbed her shoulder, assuring to look her straight in the eyes as he spoke.

“What did they do to you? Why are you crying?”

“They w-were af-fraid of me. We were playing a-and I-I hurt one. A-and they all y-yelled at me an-nd threw snowballs at me.”

You and Kylo looked to each other for a moment, exchanging a knowing look. Kylo turned back to (Y/D/N) as he continued trying to soothe her.

“What do you mean hurt one?”

She sniffled, “I-I don’t know…I p-put a hand up a-and he flew.”

Kylo sighed, noticeably tensing in the shoulders as his expression remained blank, not wanting to overwhelm her. You had discussed (Y/D/N)’s force sensitivity many times over, but it seemed now more than ever, it needed to be taken into much deeper considertaion.

“T-they called m-me a freak a-and a-a mo-onster.”

Though you were not force sensitive, you were more than positive that you felt Kylo’s rage surge through him at those words. He knew they were only children, but anyone of any age that broke his precious daughter’s heart was worth nothing less than the ground beneath his feet in his opinion. Though he was fiercely dedicated to you, he knew you could manage, all of his protective anger went to (Y/D/N)’s defense. In his eyes, a being so innocent and pure hearted deserved no such treatment, not even for a minute. Whoever these children were, he resented them already like he resented his enemies. Shaking your head with a look of empathy in your eyes, you gently brought your hand to her back as she continued her sobs.

“Oh honey, you are anything but. Come here.”

Not bothering to protest to your request, she instantly walked over to you, falling into your arms as she came unhinged. Her tears slowly started to soak your gown, running a shard through your heart. She had been so sheltered, she wasn’t even aware of her abilities and now, in her one exposure to the outside world, she was harshly turned away and ridiculed. Remembering how you were at that age, you only felt more for her, knwoing all she wanted was to fit in. To be normal.

“They’re just bullies. They know nothing about you.”

“I-I don’t wa-ant to hurt pe-ople. I do-on’t want to-to do it again.”

You rubbed her back soothingly, pulling her closer to you as you assured she was warm and shielded by you. With every sob and assembly of words she managed to choke out your heart only shattered further, knowing it was something you yourself could not fix. Looking back up, you turned your attention to Kylo, seeing him gaze at you and (Y/D/N). Though you couldn’t tell what he was thinking, you could tell by the look on his face, he held some guilt about this as well. Had he not been the father, she could have easily joined those children and played like she was supposed to at her age. Being the father however, he passed on his abilities, a burden he wished his child and heir did not have to carry. His nostrils faintly flared as he ran a hand through his hair, his expression slowly fading to one far less stern.

* * *

 

Later in the evening, with (Y/D/N) nestled into her bed, tightly tucked under the covers and reassured by you, you made your back into your bedroom. With your robe gliding behind you, you quietly pulled the fabric past the doorframe. Turning back you began to slowly close the doors, not wanting to make any other noise. As they shut, you heard Kylo’s voice behind you.

“It’s my fault.”

You turned to look at him, laying on his back as he blankly stared at the ceiling. Sighing you shook your head faintly as you made your way over to the bed, carefully seating yourself next to Kylo.

“I gave her those abilities…and now she can’t even be just a child.”

“Kylo it’s not your fault.”

“You didn’t pass on the force (Y/N)…it was me. …I’m the reason this happened to her.”

“Kylo-”

“They called our child a monster…a monster.”

His eyes turned to you, the slowly welling tears obvious to you now despite his stone cold expression.

“She’s only five…and she’s already carrying my reputation.”

“She’s not carrying a reputation Kylo, those kids just wanted to hurt her feelings and it was one of the only insults they knew. They didn’t call her that because of you.”

“…Do you know what I was called when I was her age?”

You paused, noticing that the hurt within his tone was slowly seeping in. Whatever he was about to say, you were sure he was going to tie it into this somehow. Whatever these children had said, whatever pain (Y/D/N) felt, on some level he related to it.

“Kylo that was the past.”

“…They called me a freak too…the kids I used to play with before the academy…I didn’t know my own power. …My own father…my own father, wished I was normal.”

Your eyes turned solemn as you reached a hand out to Kylo, gently placing your hand over his. He gulped, releasing a sigh before he continued.

“I said I’d keep her from what I am…shield her from the reality…but it won’t ever happen.”

“Kylo, it doesn’t have to be a bad thing, you can train her. Train her to better control her powers-”

“My powers are only used for destruction…wrath.”

“You use your powers for more.”

Kylo turned his head to face you once again, the look in his eyes not faltering for even a second. From the intensity boring into your own eyes, you could tell he was not up to debating on this topic. He was utterly convinced and more than serious.

“If she trains under me…she’ll only become as much of a monster as I am.”

“You’re not a monster.”

“Your mercy is not what will greet (Y/D/N) in the galaxy if she trains under me. …Just because you can see the good does not mean anyone else will.”

“Then what do we do?”

Kylo looked to the ceiling once again, swallowing as his nostrils flared. For a good moment of time he laid their motionless, silent. Whatever was going through his mind, he was obviously mulling it over with profound consideration.

“…We find someone else.”

“Who?”

“Someone.”

You rolled your eyes, his blunt and vague answers never really appeased you.

“Kylo, be more specific.”

“I don’t know (Y/N)…all I know is someone has to train her.”

His eyes returned to yours, the intensity hitting you once again as his adams apple bobbed in his neck.

“And it will not be me.”

He stared at you for a long moment, obviously building the tension in the air so you could feel just how seriously he was taking this decision.

“I will taint her.”

Keeping your eyes on him you nodded, gently stroking his hand with yours trying to calm him once again.

“Ok…we’ll find someone else.”

He nodded in approval, his gaze turning to the ceiling once again before he placed a kiss to your knuckles.

“Come on, lets get some rest.”

He shook his head as you gently laid on your side beside him.

“I won’t be able to sleep.”

You sighed, scooting yourself closer to his side taking in the warmth despite how stiff his muscles were. Molding into his side you laid your head on his chest.

“At least try.”

Placing a warm palm to your back, mindlessly running up and down your night gown Kylo sighed with a nod. Your eyelids slowly fell heavy as Kylo blankly stared into the ceiling, contemplating what to do next.


End file.
